About dream knitting

Last night I dreamt about binding off a project. It was a dove gray shell and the yarn was a tweedy wool, silk blend. As it always is in dreams, the knitting was perfect, gauge was spot on and the garment was going to be a perfect fit. I'm talking about knitting dreams here. Dreams where the pattern has no errors and the yarn never tangles. There are such things as knitting nightmares, but those are more likely to happen during waking hours. Like when you leave your knitting within reach of a bored dog who freaks out at the sight of a nicely wound center-pull ball of yarn. I try to not think about those times.

So back to the dream. I was about halfway through binding off a long row of stitches. (I don't know about anyone else, but in my knitting dreams the project is nearly complete.) As I was binding off in the normal fashion as directed by the pattern, it occurred to me that I should be doing the three-needle bind off so I wouldn't have to sew the shoulder seams together. Ah ha! Deviate from the pattern and....and...that was the end. I woke up.

I know! Doesn't that just suck? So many unanswered questions. Did I rip back the bound off stitches and start over with the three-needle bind off? Did I block the sweater? Did it fit? Was it glorious? I don't know...I JUST DON'T KNOW! I tried, but I couldn't get back to sleep. It was like picking up dropped stitches in a complicated yarn over, knit two together pattern. The harder I worked at it, the further the stitches slipped from my needles. I willed my subconscious into picking back up where I left off but to no use. I will never know how it turned out.

Speaking of dropped stitches...I got an e-mail today from a knitting website advertising a new book of patterns. There were several photos of the patterns offered in the book. I don't normally make fun of review patterns, however this one is special. 

What the heck is that (besides super fugly)? Captions anyone?

• Did someone hear something rip?
• Does anyone else feel a breeze?
• I seemed to have snagged my sweater.
• Duck tape is NOT going to fix this.
• Did I hear someone say they need dental floss? Just use the back of my sweater.
• Does anyone know how to pick 45 dropped stitches?
• Shit, Grandma is going to kill me!